What to do when “new tube of mascara” day fails…

It was not a good day.

In light of current events, I don’t think I can say it was a bad day. Japan had a bad day. I did not have a bad day.

But it wasn’t exactly a good day, either. Apparently a new tube of mascara cannot overcome the inevitable, foolish and fallen humanity within me.

On this not-exactly-good kind of a day, I decided to ease my troubled soul at the bookstore. Bookstores have some sort of supernatural calming effect on me. In high school, when I was feeling stressed or lonely I would drive to Barnes and Noble and hole away for hours with a biography of Nelson Mandella or Penguin Classic. Joplin doesn’t exactly have a bookstore; we have Books-A-Million, which is a sad, fraudulent excuse for a bookstore, but its better than nothing.

In my self-pity, I may or may not have blown all but $5 of my leftover Christmas money at Books-A-Million. Rows and rows of books and the smell of paper and ink and binding…. it’s like crack. I lose all of my defenses, not that I went into the store with many to begin with. But, I think my purchases were worthwhile:

#1. Mastering the Art of French Cooking, by Julia Child, Louisette Bertholle, and Simone Beck. I want to start a collection of fantastically non-Foodnetworked cookbooks. (And yes, I turned Foodnetwork into a verb.) I think this is an excellent start for this “servantless American cook who can be unconcerned with budgets, waistlines, time schedules, children’s meals, the parent-chauffeur-den-mother syndrome, or anything else which might interfere with the enjoyment of producing something wonderful to eat.” Already, I love Julia. And think I’m going to name my first child Louisette.

#2. Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day, by some people whose names I honestly don’t remember and you won’t either. I’m generally fairly skeptical about any sort of overly-enthusiastic quick-fix books, whether it be in spirituality (“Your Relationship with God in 5 Minutes a Day!”), self help (“Depression-Free in 5 Easy Steps!”), or cooking. However, my amateur dabbling into the world of bread making makes me think that making bread might actually be that easy. My dabbling also tells me that the title should actually be “Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day… plus two hours of waiting, 10 more minutes of forming the dough, and 25 minutes of baking.” Perhaps that title was a little too long.

#3. The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood. Because having feminist, dystopian literature in the same bag as a 1970’s French cookbook written by a women who wore pearls in the kitchen creates a deliciously twisted irony that makes me really, really happy.

#4. The Count of Monte Cristo, Unabridged, by Andre Dumas. I needed a splurge. Though my rational self tells me that I will not even open this 1,400+ page book until after graduation, I told you that bookstores are like crack, and I was defenseless against a classic written by someone with such a fantastically easy to mispronounce last name.

Now it is time to read… and cook… and read…. and cook….